Born and raised in Etlan, Virginia was the eldest of Fred Icer and Sarah Catherine Hale Coates’s six children. Virginia spent her childhood on Champe Plain Farm, helping with chores and creating cherished memories with her loving parents, grandparents, aunts, uncles, and a host of Coates, Hale, Kipps, and Yowell cousins. Her early life was filled with joy, especially during family gatherings and church homecomings at FT Baptist, Hebron Lutheran, and Mt. Nebo Lutheran churches.

After graduating from Criglersville High School in 1944, then went on to graduate from Bridgewater College. She began teaching home economics and coaching softball at Calverton High School in Fauquier County, where she met her future husband, Jesse Paul Ruffner, who umpired the school’s softball games.

Virginia and Jesse were married and built a home in Catlett, where they raised their two children. During this time, she paused her career to focus on her family and became a devoted member of Trinity United Methodist Church, where she taught Sunday School.

Following Jesse’s passing in 1965, Virginia returned to teaching—her certification proving to be a vital lifeline. She often said that the class she was substituting for and its children were a blessing. She continued teaching with heart and dedication until her retirement in 1991.

Virginia returned to the classroom, teaching second grade at Warrenton Elementary School and later at H.M. Pearson Elementary, where she remained until her retirement in 1991. She was not only a devoted mother and teacher, but a mentor to younger educators and a compassionate presence to generations of children. Her students and family alike remember her as patient, attentive, and deeply loving—always present for the moments that mattered.

In addition to teaching, Virginia was a creative soul and an avid collector. She crocheted, quilted, cultivated flower beds and vegetable gardens, and collected antiques, buttons, seashells, fabric, and more—often claiming it was “for the children’s art projects,” and occasionally, it truly was. Her imagination was boundless, and her enthusiasm for new projects was contagious.

She was a member of the Fauquier Retired Teachers Association, the United Daughters of the American Revolution, the Daughters of the Confederacy, a lifetime member of the Madison County Quilters Guild, and a longtime member of the Virginia Consortium of Quilters.

After retiring, Virginia embraced travel, taking her first flight in 1989. She later visited Japan and Germany, delighting in the discovery of new cultures and experiences.

Virginia was preceded in death by her husband, Jesse Paul Ruffner; her great-grandson, Joshua Avent; and her three brothers: James William “Jim Bill” Coates, John Hale Coates, and Frederick Ross Coates.

She is survived by her daughter, Lucy Catherine “Kitty” Ruffner Avent Bull, and husband Warren; her son, John Paul Ruffner, and wife Colleen; her grandchildren: Bradley Avent (Esther), Stuart Bull (Matthew), Sally Bull (Michael Thompson), Philip Ruffner, Kirsten Ruffner (Ben De Los Reyes), Haley Ruffner, and Preston Ruffner; and her great-grandchildren: Thomas Avent, Oliver Bull, Riley Bull, Leon De Los Reyes, and Theodore Thompson. She is also survived by her sisters, Catherine Hitt and Anna Boyd, and a large extended family of nieces, nephews, cousins, and dear friends.

Visitation will be held at 10:00 a.m.  on Thursday, May 15, 2025 at Preddy Funeral Home in Madison, followed by a memorial service at 11:00 a.m.  Interment will follow at Trinity United Methodist Church Cemetery in Catlett.

In lieu of flowers, the family requests that donations be made in Virginia’s memory to Mt. Nebo Lutheran Church in Madison or Trinity United Methodist Church in Catlett.